Perhaps after today...I cannot feel anymore. I've shown no emotion, even though on the inside I'm crying and begging. Begging for someone to help me. Maybe I can feel on the inside. But maybe not on the outside. I don't want to though. Emotions are my weakness, and I defy weaknesses. Because when I'm weak, I cry. And I've cried enough....

After today, I don't want to have my emotions. I want someone to help me though. But then again, I really just don't. Mom tries to help me, but I don't want anyone's help. Even though on the inside I really do. My emotions are so damaged at this point...I don't know what to do anymore...